I`ve been in this state of absence for a while, my days seem to roll into one, my future scares and i can`t seem to separate yesterday from the day before. Is it depression? Could be, with the stress of getting into post secondary, my job and some damaged relationships, it might as well be. There is this fear that many people claim to have or been through but I can`t imagine that because my fear is so PERSONAL. No one else could have felt this. No one else could fathom the absentmindedness, tears, and loneliness.
As I tried to lift myself out of this mood, by :
1. Listening to Katy Perry-fireworks
2. Listening to Miley Cyrus-When i look at you
4.Sleeping until 3pm (crazy i know)
5.Researching and planning my next 6 months
I realized my fear is not personal, hundreds of people feel this burden of fear because of the unknown. The unknown for the next step really drives people up the wall, the unknown creates the sense of immediate failure. Why? This I can`t answer yet, but when I find it I will definitely share my knowledge.
Fear: A painful emotion or passion excited by the expectation of evil, or the apprehension of impending danger; apprehension; anxiety; solicitude; alarm; dread.